Unveiling the triggers behind impulsive spending and how EFT can help you catch yourself before you buy
Why do we buy something we don’t need, then regret it minutes later? This urge is driven by a brain chemical that peaks before you have even paid. Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT), or tapping, offer a simple way to neutralise the urge to buy and understand what is hiding behind it.
Just one quick trip to the shops...
You’re working on your business and it’s getting increasingly frustrating. Suddenly, you find yourself thinking about buying something and start wondering what to get. Are you running out of milk or bread? Do you need food? Clothes? You come up with a short list of items you really should buy and head out, reassuring yourself you’ll get back to work as soon as you return.
You pick up the items on your list and then something catches your eye. It feels like love at first sight. You just have to have it! You grab it and take it to the till without thinking. You’re in a sort of trance, picturing yourself in this new dress and feeling much better. Before you know it, you’ve paid for a new dress (or a new necklace) that you don’t actually need and have gone over your weekly budget. You take it home, still feeling elated. However, when you take it out and look at it again, it no longer looks so great, and you start wondering why you had to buy it. Feeling guilty, you put it away.
It's not a character flaw: it's chemistry
Seeing something that catches our eye can activate the brain’s reward system, with dopamine playing an important role in motivation and anticipation.
Dopamine is a chemical messenger in the brain that plays a central role in motivation, learning, and the brain’s reward system. It helps drive us towards things we expect will feel rewarding.
This feeling of anticipation can be particularly strong right up until the item is paid for, which is why browsing, imagining discovering something special, and taking it straight to the till can sometimes feel more exciting than actually owning it. At the same time, the part of the brain involved in weighing consequences can become less influential when the urge for an immediate reward is strong.
This is why trying to talk yourself out of it can feel so impossible.
Back when I was smoking, I found it extremely hard to focus. The craving for a cigarette would enter my mind and gradually intensify until I became fixated on it. I would obsess over it and look forward to the moment I could smoke. But when I gave in and smoked, it usually didn’t feel that nice. The anticipation was often more intense than the actual experience.
This is what impulsive buying feels like to me.
What's really behind the urge?
The brain’s reward system does play an important role in impulse buying. Seeing something appealing can trigger the urge to buy, but how strongly we respond to that urge is often connected to how we are feeling in that moment. Sometimes the purchase is not really about the item itself, but about trying to create a feeling we want, such as excitement, comfort, confidence, or a sense of control.
In the example above, the person is frustrated with problems in their business. Going shopping offers a way to step away from those feelings and regain a sense of control. Making a purchase can create a temporary feeling of being in charge again, even if that feeling does not last.
Recognising this can change the question from “Why can’t I stop myself buying this?” to “What am I really looking for right now?”
How EFT can help
Knowing that an impulse purchase is connected to a feeling does not always make the urge disappear. When the desire to buy something feels strong, it can be difficult to understand what is really happening in that moment.
EFT (Emotional Freedom Techniques), also known as tapping, can help bring awareness to the emotions behind the urge. By acknowledging what we are feeling while tapping on specific points, we create space to notice what is driving the desire to buy.
Impulse buying may sometimes be connected to a feeling that something is missing. We may believe that a new dress, a new household item, or something else will help us feel more confident, happier, or more complete. Tapping can help us explore these feelings and understand the need underneath the urge.
If you are new to EFT tapping, I have created a guide that explains the basics and how to get started. You can learn the technique yourself and use it to become more aware of the emotions behind an urge.
Tapping script
Put your hands on your heart centre, focus on your impulse buying issue and take a slow deep breath, in and out.
Set up
Side of the Hand: Even though I really, really feel like going to the shops right now, I am a good person and I accept how I feel in this moment. (x3)
Going through the points
Eyebrow: I really feel like going to the shops
Side of the Eye: I feel like shopping
Under Eye: There are things I want
Under Nose: And things I need
Chin: And other things I may not need
Collarbone: But I just want to go have a look in case there is something I really like
Under Arm: Maybe there will be something nice?
Top of the Head: It’s so hard to focus when I just want to go to the shops
Eyebrow: I really fancy going to go to the shops right now
Side of the Eye: Have a browse around
Under Eye: Perhaps I could look at that (dress/jumper/something you saw) I really like again?
Under Nose: It is so hard to focus, I just want to go to the shops now.
Chin: I just can’t wait
Collarbone: I can already picture myself among all those brand new clothes
Under arm: Looking at them
Top of the Head: Checking out the fabrics, the colours, and the cuts and finding something I really like
Eyebrow: It feels so exciting
Side of the Eye: It’s so hard to resist!
Under Eye: Shops or work?
Under Nose: Shops
Chin: I can’t focus and there is so much to do.
Collarbone: I could go to the shops and buy something and I would feel so much better
Under Arm: I just want to buy something new to feel better
Top of the Head: I feel overwhelmed and buying something would make me feel better.
Eyebrow: It will, right?
Side of Eye: Or maybe not
Under Eye: It is so hard to work when all I can think about is going to the shops
Under Nose: Am I trying to escape?
Chin: Is there something bothering me?
Collarbone: I have so much to do, but I want to go to the shops!
Under Arm: Maybe I could go later?
Top of the Head: Finish what I started first?
Eyebrow: The shops are not going anywhere!
Under Eye: But I could move forward with my work
Chin: Is there something bothering me?
Collarbone: Why does going to the shops feel more important than my business?
Under Arm: I know I deserve good things
Top of the Head: How about waiting until I have finished my work?
Eyebrow: I could go later
Side of the Eye: It would be a treat!
Under Eye: Perhaps I had too much to do and I felt overwhelmed?
Under Nose: Maybe I was not sure where I was going?
Chin: Maybe I need more clarity?
Collarbone: Maybe I lacked direction and didn’t know where to start?
Under Arm: How about waiting until I have done some more work?
Top of the Head: I could go to the shops later, if I still want to
Final thoughts
Understanding impulse buying can help us see that it is not simply a matter of willpower or a character flaw. It is a response influenced by our brain’s reward system, our emotions, our experiences, and the environment around us. EFT can help us become more aware of the emotions connected to the urge, creating space to make a more conscious choice.
If impulse buying has caused you to worry about your everyday expenses, here is a tapping script to help with the anxiety that can come up around bills.
I hope you found this script useful.
Daphne
EFT can be used to support a wide range of emotional issues and challenges.
If you have something you would like to explore and are unsure whether EFT could help, feel free to get in touch for a chat.
You can also follow my Facebook page for EFT tips, updates, events, and special offers.